Why does your girlfriend dislike you emailing or talking to friends on the phone and wants you to be with her at all times with the exception of when you are at work and why do you like this treatment?

Answer 1

It doesn't sound like a security issue it sounds more like a control issue. A woman should have security but at the same time she should be secure within herself as well and trust you enough to allow you to have friends as well as go out alone without her. Being joined at the hip to anyone everyday all day will become boring and possibly drive you crazy eventually. Your girl friend may want to seek some type of counseling to help her see why she is afraid to be alone and to allow you some space to grow and be the man that you are destined to be. Definitely don't settle for this and find a solution for the answer because you are going to be the one effected in the long run. For instance if you have friends that email and call you and you never do the same eventually they will resent you and say you are not being a very good friend and pull away. Is a relationship of control worth being by yourself and having no friends aside from that one girlfriend for the rest of your life. Because trust me it is not going to get better it is going to get worse. I have been in your shoes before and it was very hard to get rid of this person who refused to get help. Bad part is I lost a lot of good friends and I lost part of myself that has taken a long time to find. Yes you will need counseling if you continue to tolerate this type of controlling behavior. The reason you may like it right now is because its a feeling that masquerades itself in the form of love but it really is not. Read some books on co-dependency relationships and how people will become dependent on you. If you have been in abusive relationships yourself and have not allowed yourself sufficient time to heal before entering into other ones then you might be afraid of being alone yourself. So right now this type of attention you are receiving seems wonderful but it will get old very soon. Please do not fail to read up on this subject as well as seek some type of resolution for this situation. God Bless you and do what you need to do to help yourself. You will thank yourself for it in the long run. Woman have a need for security. Maybe there are ways that you can show your girlfriend that you care about her and value time spent with her by planning regular dates, not e-mailing or calling people when you have planned to be with her and by communicating to her when you need time to yourself.