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Yes they do because that's when they feel good. They need someone to bully because they don't know how to deal with negative situations that occur in their lives. They enjoy hurting the partner because it makes them feel big...even for a moment.
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∙ 14y ago
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Can a verbal abuser be arrested?
No I dont think so, but if he verbally abuses you then maybe its time fo you to get out of the relationship.
What happens to an abuser after the partner leave?
Who cares. They sure don't.
Can a man from non-abusive upbringing become an abuser if with a partner who grew up in an abusive home with no therapy at all?
It is highly unlikely that man who does not have an abusive personality will become an abuser if their partner grew up in an abusive home and refuses help. Good men know they should never hit a woman which in some cases can lead to male abuse by a woman. The stress of being around an abusive person be it verbally or physical abuse is bound to have effects on the non abusive partner, but most men will only take so much and have the opportunity of leaving the relationship.
Does an abuser take pleasure in hurting his partner emotionally?
Most times yes, this is all part of the "control" game. For the person being abused this can, over time, create a dependency towards this. I know that sounds horrible, but you will find that many that are in an abusive relationship that get away, tend to careen back to abusive type people. Knowing they would hit you installs the belief of the abuser being a form of personal security or defender. This may or may not be an actual truth if the person is confronted by another individual. Such as A hitting B in a bar and C getting upset about it and confronting A. This is a very dangerous road to travel down as you may not know the level someone will go with the abuse.AnswerYes. AnswerYes. Don't stay with an abuser. AnswerChances are the abuser was abused as a child. This is the only way they know how to communicate. I would let them know how much it is hurting me, and I would encourage them to seek therapy. I was in a verbally abusive relationship once, and you don't realize how much it destroys who you are. I went from having the most confidence and self esteem, to having next to none. I got out of that relationship (I eventually found out he was into drugs). I then met my future husband, and I realized what I was missing out on all those years. AnswerI don't agree with the people above who said yes. No, they don't take pleasure in it. They aren't happy when they do it. Saying that an abuser takes pleasure in abusing is like saying that a runner enjoys giving up when he isn't winning a race. The abuser isn't saying "Today is such a good day. I think I'll go fishing and then abuse my wife for a while and then I'll go get ice cream." I'm not trying to justify the abusers actions; they are absolutely not OK. NEVER stay in a relationship where there is physical abuse. But, if you want to, you can help to change someone who is a verbal/emotional abuser, and you do have a chance of saving the relationship. The only way to do this is to understand what he is feeling. If you think that he takes pleasure in it and he does it for fun, then you definitely don't understand what he is feeling. Abusers are usually frustrated and angry but they just don't know how to communicate well. They don't want to be their partner's peer; they want to be in control, and they crave power. Instead of talking about problems with his partner, he will take it out on her. (I am making the assumption that this is a male abuser and a female partner. Of course this is an unfortunate stereotype, but the same applies for any type of relationship.) He does not take pleasure in hurting his partner, physically or emotionally, but for whatever reason, he either thinks that this is the best way to tell you something or control you, or he is just using you to take out his anger. This isn't OK. NEVER stay in a relationship where you are being physically abused. If there is verbal/emotional abuse, don't put up with it. It needs to stop. But if there is no physical abuse, there is still a chance of saving the relationship. In order to help him change, it is important to understand completely why he does what he does. Ask him about it. Pick your moment well and word it in a way that isn't accusatory or threatening. Don't call him an abuser, just ask him why he says the things he says. Don't let him pass the blame; it isn't your fault that he's abusing you. You want to find out the feelings underlying his abuse. Ask him if he is venting anger. Once you find out what makes him do what he does, you can help him to stop.You might also want to suggest that you and him go to relationship therapy.
Can a verbal abuser be forced into an abuser program if the alternative is making his family suffer for the rest of their lives because he has no concept of respect for them?
If someone is verbally abusive to their family than the family can seek counciling for theirself and the abuser. Other alturnitive is to kick the abuser out of the house. If they are under 18 than the parents could talk to the school councelor about their behavior at school and they may recommend help.
What is the difference between a controlling partner and a verbally or emotionally abusive partner?
Abuse, whether it's verbal or physical, is all about controlling the partner. A controlling partner is an abusive partner. They may control various parts of the victims's life: *the victim's schedule, and the need to "check in" or "report" to the abuser at various times * the victim's attempts to express her disatisfaction. The abuser will attempt to control the situation by comments, "I'm not talking about this," "That's not what you said/did/felt about it," ignoring the victim, sulking, pouting, physical threats, throwing objects, etc. * the victim's feelings of responsibility. The abuser will say at some points,"You make me feel good," and at others,"You make me feel bad/hate you/want to hurt you/treat you like this." The abuser makes the person feel responsible for all his behavior. * who the victim can talk to: her friends, her family, co-workers, total strangers. The abuser tries to control what the victims says to those people as well. *the victim's finances and independence--the abuser will withhold money from the victim, give the victim an allowance, or not allow a victim to seek employment so she can have her own money. *Self esteem. Through criticisms and belittling, the abuser can diminish and control the victims's confidence in her skills, her intelligence, her body image. "You're not smart/pretty enough," "You think you're actually going to be able to do that?" "You should be glad someone like me wanted to date you,". If you're with someone who behaves in a controlling manner, the best thing you can do is end the relationship, no matter how difficult it seems.
After being in a verbally abusive relationship does the victim often become the abuser in her next relationship?
It does often happen that people will learn how to get their way through verbal aggression, from their own experiences of being verbally abused. Life is an endless learning experience, but sometimes people learn the wrong things. Answer I think it COULD happen but I think it would be the exception and not the rule. Victims in these kinds of situations are usually not abusive types of people - that's why they are victims. If it is an adult who grew up in a verbally abusive environment they may be the victim for a while and then finally snap and turn the tables and become the abuser but I think in most circumstances the victim would not become the abuser in the next relationship.
How do you get out of a verbally abusive relationship when you work with the abuser every day and quitting is not an option you can afford?
It all depends on the situation. If the "abuser" is the boss and owner, you can either put up with it or leave. If it's a co-worker in a big company, get the abuse documented and take your complaint to a supervisor or manager.
Can a man from non-abusive upbringing become an abuser if abused by a partner who grew up in an abusive home with no therapy at all?
it is possible
What are the conditions that a church grant annulment of a marriage?
Before consummating marriage if their partner is an abuser or if they the don't want to have any more children.
When will you tell your partner about your history of domestic violence?
That would be crazy if it was yourself who was the abuser, because you would want to pretend you're a good person!!
Can an abuser change for a healthy partner?
yes, if they want to change then they will have to work as hard as they can. Change is hard but still good if you are changing to the good side.
