How do you love a girlfriend who has a marijuana and alcohol addiction?

Answer 1

She's young and thinks she has it all under control and, she's in denial about it so she's not about to listen to you. You can give her the option of saying, "Well, if you can control then stop it, because I don't like it." She may just do that if she cares about you enough and it's one way to find out just how hooked on both she is. If she is really trying then be there and see her through the rough spots, but please, understand that you would have to keep your eyes on her 100% of the time because it's tough breaking some of these habits. If she isn't willing to try then it's time to move on. Don't waste your time after trying the once, and realize you can't change people: they have to want to change themselves. It may be that losing you will convince her of what damage it can do; if it does, you could give here another chance if she shows she can do it.

ANSWER

First suggesion I would make is you attending Co-Dependency or Al Anono meeting. So you can draw a line in the sand, and not get sucked UNDER> The active addict has a tricky way of the persons in their lives to give up money, material items, and on and on. Until you have nothing left to give emotionally or financially

An addict or alcoholic has no way of controlling how much or when they use. It would be like a person with cancer, they will not have another bouth with cancer. It is a disease and nothing anyone can predict or see coming.

If she is willing to enter an Inpatinet Treatment Center,knowing that you support her is important. But be advised, very few people get it the first time through treatment. If she does go to inpatient treatment she must follow it up with outpatient adn 12 Step meetings. If she tells you she knows she'll never use again.Run or have her talk depth with her sponsor, yes she needs a full time female sponsor. Stick by her if you really love her and want to spend your life with her. If not or if questionable, get out now. If I can be of further help pleasse email me. God Bless ReggieR 25+ yrs counselor/29 yrs in recovery

FIRST OF ALL: If you love her, you will help her with an alcohol addiction. Second, marijuana is not addictive. lol

Answer

To love someone who has an addiction can definitely put you through a whirlwind of emotions. When a loved one is an addict, you want to do everything you can to be there for them and help them. However, it can be difficult. My biological mother is an alcoholic/drug addict and I did everything I could to help her. If your girlfriend is trying to get help, that is wonderful. Be there for her and support her through every step. Encourage her and tell her things that are positive, such as "You can do this, I know you can, I love you, you are strong. Do NOT give up!" If she attends Alcoholics Anonymous, Attend Al-Anon. If she goes to rehab, visit her. Write her uplifting letters, poems, buy books on how to deal with and heal addiction. And most importantly of all - Pray for her. If you are both believers, pray together. If you are not, just be there for her, show her that you love her and want to be with her every step of the way.

If she is refusing to get help, all you can do is try to talk to her - maybe even find a counselor who specializes in substance abuse to help out. When someone refuses to get help with their problem, all you can do is try to talk to them. My bio-mom refuses to give up alcohol and drugs, so I just had to move on with my life after trying to help her for too long. If that's the case, then the best thing for YOU is to move on. If she's bringing you down and won't quit, you'll just have to walk away. That's what I had to do with my bio-mom. If she's not going to get help and won't listen to anyone else, then it's in your best interest to move on.