It is good to talk about it so that you can move on. If you just hold it all inside then you never really let it go. Talk with someone that you really trust.
People tend to say things in anger. Since your husband is abusive you should consider going to a Woman's Abuse House to find help and learn tools to cope. No one has the right to abuse the other. Your relationship is toxic and you are in control of your life and not your husband. To tell him you are going to kill him is a serious accusation and when you get to this point it's time for you to leave this abusive relationship.
It does often happen that people will learn how to get their way through verbal aggression, from their own experiences of being verbally abused. Life is an endless learning experience, but sometimes people learn the wrong things. Answer I think it COULD happen but I think it would be the exception and not the rule. Victims in these kinds of situations are usually not abusive types of people - that's why they are victims. If it is an adult who grew up in a verbally abusive environment they may be the victim for a while and then finally snap and turn the tables and become the abuser but I think in most circumstances the victim would not become the abuser in the next relationship.
In my experience, you can't. What you can do is let this person know you love him/her. Try to be nonjudgemental throughout the process. Be willing to help if and when this person is ready to leave the abusive relationship. Just try to be the solid, trustworthy person in their life. Try not to get angry or raise your voice. Look around your community for help, like battered women's shelters, churches who have the ability to help. Let your friend know that you have a plan when he/she is ready. If you see imminent danger, call 911. Hope this helps!
Some one who does not understand BDSM posted "being into bdsm is an unhealthy sign" this is a lie. All studies of people into BDSM have shown that most people into BDSM are happy normal people who just have kinks to there life. Most people who are into abusive relationships never get into BDSM relationships. If someone is into BDSM and there is also a abusive relationship going on all you need to do is look for the normal signs of a abusive relationship. Most BDSM couples for the most part have happy and healthy relationships but have a relationship that looks more like the idealized ones from the 1950's and may add play that would look abusive from the outside but is truly not. What I would tell people is take time to talk to both parties and look for the signs of an abusive relationship.
For the most part, those that show abusive behavior are reflectant of how they were treated during their childhood. Thus abusive behavior as adults is not only satisfactory because the abuser in a twisted way can identify with the abused, but also is a show of dominance and superiority for someone who, for the majority of their life as a child, were inferior to their caregivers.
If a boy is being mean to you, that is mis-treatment ... drop that bozo like a hot potato. Attitude is paramount in any relationship ... both the guy and the gal deserve equal respect and treatment. To be otherwise, is just plain abusive and not much good will become of that kind of relationship. Get on with life ... next?
A good reason to stay in a relationship is when that relationship improves you as a person, improves your life to some degree, and you have the same effect on the life/lives of those you share a relationship. If these qualities are missing from a relationship, then it will only drain the participants emotionally.
To have a good relationship there have to be love,trust, honesty involved to have a good relationship and someone you wanna spend the whole of your life with he/she can not a liar. you must be a good person. To be honest i would have trust, love, honesty and thrill to be with your partner. You could be with this person your whole life, have children, and always be together. That makes a good relationship. the person that you are with has to be a nice person and not fool you around like a stuffed toy.
* This could be a warning that he will be abusive in the future. If you don't want to end up dead or seriously injured, it would be a good idea to get out of that relationship now. * No manshould ever hit any women! This is abuse! If a man gets frustrated by the actions of a woman he is free to leave that relationship and not reduce himself to abusing women. It is also not right for a woman to hit a man without provocation such as being attacked with intent to rape. Get rid of this low life! You deserve better!
If you are in an abusive relationship, it will certainly effect you. If you had a dirty house when you were a child, for example, you can develop OCD later in life. Everything about the environment that you live in can affect mental health and that is why it is so important to maintain an environment that makes you feel good and at peace.
It depends on the circumstances. If you were the abuser or the victim you need to think about your future very clearly. If you were abused often but not daily by someone who would not seek help you need to consider if your relationship should be terminated completely if they are still unwilling. If you are an abuser you need to pinpoint when and why you started such behavior and most likely involve yourself in some sort of therapy. If radically abusive or abused you need to seek intense therapy. If you stood around and took terrible abuse for a long period of time you probably are in need of therapy as badly as the abuser. Just decide if you need to seek therapy or simply continue your life. You'll find happiness in being single if you were abused for a long period of time, and if you run into a new abusive partner or get together with the same partner and he stays abusive then you need to cancel that relationship and remind yourself it is not your fault. Good luck, I know that emotional and physical abuse can be taxing and dealing with it is difficult.
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