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Abused Men
Instances of men being abused by their partner – physically, emotionally or even sexually – are as prevalent as women abuse. Unfortunately, many of these cases go unreported because male victims have to contend with social standards of men being the abuser.
259 Questions
Can another woman change a man who abused his first wife?
There is only a very small percentage of men who actually can achieve this. More women will seek out psychological counseling than men. Men feel weak if they do so, and also abusers feel it's everyone else's fault and never their own. Often it's the environment they themselves have been brought up in. If you are the abuser by coming on this board it was a big step for you and there is real hope that you can get over this. The next step is to seek psychological counseling. We all carry garbage tied to our butts through life and you must have some issues to deal with as well. If you are a woman, go to your Abused Women's Center in your town and seek out help. You will get plenty of it there. If you are a man that is abused, there are Abused Centers for Men and everything is highly confidential whether it be man or woman. Good luck Marcy
If you had your nose broken by your ex-boyfriend out of malice is it too late to press charges?
- If you your ex boyfriend broke your nose in the past month and you have photos of your broken nose then yes, you can go to the police and press charges against your ex boyfriend and give them a copy of the picture or pictures of your broken nose as well as a copy of the hospital report when you had your broken nose set. If he broke your nose many months ago then it is highly unlikely that you can charge him now.
Why do gentle women choose abusive men?
I think it has something to do with the fact that some women want a "manly man". One that is rough and rugged and can do things that "men are supposed to do". More often than not these 'manly men' are abusive as well. Best Answer usually the abusive men are the ladies man at first and all they really want to get in your pants so if you reject him or her then they will probly hit u once at first and he/she will say i will never do it again... so they say Do you REALLY think that a Women chooses an "abusive man". I don't believe that when a Women starts dating or gets Married to a man that he is abusive. (Correct me if I'm wrong Ladies) The relation turns abusive after the fact, be it mental of physical. My Sister dated a physically abusive man and my Brother was married to a mentally abusive women. So as you see it can go both way's. What the person being abused needs to realize is that they are Stronger then they think, and that there is something MUCH better out there for them then what they have. Hope This Helps.
Answer 3 In this situation, a particular woman doesn't chose an abusive man. She has this need to nurture a man to feel good about herself. She is attracted to an abusive man who exhibits a need to be nurtured. For example, the abuser could have a need to find a place to live due to financial problems etc, and is willing to speed the relationship up faster than a non abusive man. Or the man tells her he is trying to stop using alcohol or drugs and she feels the need to help him get better. The abuser will never appear to be weak because he is trying to cover-up his weaknesses. If a normal man doesn't give this woman a reason to nurture him, she will become bored with him and seek another man to fulfill the need to nurture. I'm an old man who has seen this behavior repeated over and over again by nurturing women and men. Truth is anyone who falls in love with someone because they are in need or mis-understood by society needs help them self.
What type of women get abused?
Abuse cuts across cultures, societies, races, ethnicities, and social-economic demographics.
But there is a profile of a "typical" abuse victim, based on worldwide statistics:
Most abuse victims are women, young, uneducated, poor, and non-white.
AnswerEvery type of women has been abused. It doesn't matter age color, etc. AnswerI disagree with the statistics. I am a white 38 yr old woman educated in historic restoration from a middle class family. I think any woman can be abused because nobody pinpoints what emotional and psychological abuse is and then educates their pre-teen girls about what to watch out for. One of the reasons people don't talk about it is because our media (especially morning talk radio) is saturated with abuse of everyone and it is accepted as 'humor'. AnswerI think the statistics demonstrate a general guideline. This said, abuse can happen anywhere....Abuse touches all kinds of people. I have many examples of well educated friends (lawyers, university teachers etc) that were completely under their aggressor's mercy.... The most important thing is to set up a support system and not be afraid to ask for help. Even just reading sites like these can help. It helped me.... AnswerI understand that the number of women who are abused by men is astronomical compared to the reverse situation, but why can't I find *something* about men so devoted to their wives/partners and so lost that they can't tell if they're being abused or what to do about it? AnswerLow self esteem, most of the time starting from a childhood experience of trust. Feeling like she may deserve her abuse from living it in the past or present. AnswerI work in a Women's Abuse Center and every type of women can meet her match if luck isn't running along side of her. Abusive men can be quite sneaky and at first he never shows his true colors until it's further into the relationship when there is a little more pressure and demands in the marriage or relationship. Abuse DOES hit every race, culture and ANY woman from doctors, lawyers, to the middle class and poor!Working at the Abuse Center has taught me a great deal and anyone who is pious enough to believe it can never happen to them is a fool! Most of us are lucky enough to have good men and we don't have to deal with this, but believe me, when you have seen some of these abusive men in action (the law seldom protects women, and nurses and doctors are there to heal and not get too involved) and the woman is so frightened she often doesn't press charges.
People who aren't abused should think of these things:
There is little help out there legally for a woman that is being abused. The terror some of these women go through is something we couldn't even imagine. I've seen women in the hospital with their throats slit (superficial thank God), blackened eyes, broken noses, ribs, or any bone in the body you would like to choose is smashed! I've seen up to 12 stab wounds, and as many as 16 slashes to the face. I've seen a woman that had acid thrown in her face! Oh yes, she got away from her abuser, but because of our laws in Canada and the U.S., he threw acid in her face when she was walking to her car. The excuse by law enforcement for this .... "Until the abuser takes action there is nothing we can do." An abuser can phone, come to your home and threaten and even ruin your property. He can slash your tires, burn our car and more. As long as he doesn't touch a hair on your head, the laws are ... you simply can't do much ... wait until he nearly kills you! So, why shouldn't these women be terrified?
This is not a situation easily resolved by a few clipped words on a board and until a person who hasn't been abused walks a mile in the victim's shoes it just isn't all that cut and dried!
Marcy
AnswerA victim of abuse can be the girl who didn't listen to the voice inside her gut. The woman who thought he was a nice guy. The little girl who didn't know better. A victim of abuse can be the little old lady who's husband died 2 years ago and she has just started dating. A victim of abuse can be the woman that had "his" sex changed 12 years ago. He's been living so proud as Sally ever since :) You NEVER know what types of women get abused, there is no type. Abuse doesn't discriminate! AnswerThere is no type. The question should be what types of men abuse. I cna answer that one for you. Men who are inscure, needy and fearfull of life and abandomoment. The only thing that matters to them is control. They don't care how you think or feel as long as they can control you. AnswerIt may seem like there is a particular type, but, in reality it can be anyone. And off course, emotional and pyshical abuse is hard to detect. I learned somewhere that these woman sometimes have a great sense of spirituality, love, and compassion, willing to stay till the end.How do you help your son who is being emotionally abused by his wife?
If you just do not like how your ex-husband talks to your son, that might not be a form of abuse that would be legally recognized. It may just be a matter of some difference in philosophical opinion between you and your husband. Perhaps (for all I know) you are a Republican and he is a Democrat, and you interpret this as mental abuse. However, if your ex-husband is truly abusing your son, you should be able to obtain a restraining order from a court, that will legally prohibit him from talking to your son or even getting close to him. Failing that, you can still talk to your son yourself, and help him to understand what is going on. There are not always easy solutions to these kinds of situations and you may just have to do the hard work of preparing your son to deal with mentally abusive people - and we all meet such people in the course of our lives.
Who helped Butch Defeo murder his family?
Ronald "Butch" DeFeo was a heavy drug user who had financial problems due to his habit. He also had ongoing issues with his parents, especially his father, due to his drug abuse and prior violent behaviors.
There apparently was a great amount of tension and arguments in the DeFeo household; Ronald DeFeo, Sr. was considered to be hot tempered and authoritarian towards his family, Butch DeFeo bearing the brunt of his father's behavior growing up; he then started to act out violently himself. The DeFeos were concerned enough about Butch's increasingly violent and erratic behavior to send him to a therapist, with little result. The DeFeos alternated between arguing with their son and placating him with expensive gifts.
A few weeks before the murders, Butch claimed he was robbed of money that he was supposed to deposit in the bank for his father's car dealership; both the police and DeFeo, Sr. felt that Butch himself had stolen the money and further fights broke out between father and son.
DeFeo, Jr. tried to claim to police it was a mob "hit" on his entire family (even though there is no evidence that his father had any ties to organized crime). The following day, DeFeo confessed to the murders. The most legitimate motive appears to be rage towards his parents over prior issues and an attempt to collect on their life insurance policies. Exactly why DeFeo murdered his siblings is still unclear; possibly to eliminate them as witnesses.
Over the years, DeFeo has given various inconsistent statements regarding the murders.
There is still controversy over whether any accomplices were involved in the killings. At various times in the past, DeFeo has alleged his sister Dawn was the instigator of the killings and that he then murdered her after she killed their siblings. There is controversy over whether Dawn DeFeo had any part in the murders or if she was an innocent victim.
DeFeo has frequently changed his story and his motive over the years (at one point, taking wholesale from the "Amityville Horror" hoax and claiming he was possessed by demons or heard voices who told him to kill his family) that any statements from him must be regarded with great skepticism.
How many people suffer from domestic violence in a year?
Estimates range from 960,000 incidents of violence against a current or former spouse, boyfriend, or girlfriend per year to three million women who are physically abused by their husband or boyfriend per year.
Do men get physically and mentally abused?
Yes, more often than women ormenthink. Most men are brought up not to hit women and stick to that practice so when a man is hit, slapped, shoved, scratched or has things thrown at him or she is verbally abusive he takes it because most men feel everything is revolved around women being abused and that women are the weaker sex. Men don't realize that there are programs out there to help them and that society is becoming moreaware that men can be physically or mentally abused as well as women. Men that are abused are basically in their own private world of hell. They can't tell family, they can't talk to their male friends because most other men would wonder what is wrong with him for not 'slapping her down and controlling the situation.' The poor guy being abused can't win for losing. I know two cases of female abuse againsta malemate. My girlfriend's son is married toa young woman that is a heavy drinker and gets nasty when she does drink. One night he was in bed sound asleep and she went over and punched him square in the nose! Of course he woke up in great shock and couldn't figure out what happened to him. He staggered to the bathroom to look in the mirror at his bloody nose and she nailed him behind the knees with a golf club! He hit the floor like a rock! As soon as he could function he picked up the phone, called the police and had her taken away in handcuffs and let her stew overnight in jail. She has never hit him since, but is verbally abusive. The other case was a man that works with my brother. This man would come to work with stitches in his face and black eyes. When asked what happened he would cover it up by saying he got into a brawl at a pub the night before rather than admit his wife beat him up. He eventually confided in my brother. Just like some women feeling they are stuck with an abusive man, this man felt he was doomed to stay with his wife and was actually a victim of her abuse! One day he came into work and announced his wife had a massive heart attack and died. Of course the coworkers were saddened to hear this (what other reaction could they show) and he smiled and said, 'I'm free at last!' Sad, but true.
Why do narcissistic women abuse men who are co-dependent?
Narcissists (whether male or female) abuse their partner (whether male or female) to excert power and control. Codependents are extremely vunerable because of their dependancy on relationships and ther fear of being alone. They tend, more than others, to hang on too long and put up with too much before leaving.
What happens inside your heart when you love someone?
The heart is just a muscle that's job is to circulate blood in the body. There is no actual physiological change when you love someone, that's just kind of an old saying.
How do you get a submissive woman to like you?
If you really love and like her, inside and out, just show her that and tell her how you feel. If she doesn't like you as much as you like her, just respect that and keep searching for the right one. To get a really submissive woman to like you, you must be gentle, honest, trustworthy, dependable and never speak in an ambiguous way that could cause any misunderstanding. You need to be very patient and let her come to you when she feels safe enough.Then don't EVER take advantage of her submissive nature. Build up her self esteem. Let her know she is worthy of the best in a relationship, and that in marriage, the partners are equal.These women need constant re-inforcement. If you really love one of these delicate flowers, you must be willing to put in the work. As long as they feel safe, you will have a loving and true companion.
- You did not say whether these children were yours and your exes or they were the children of your ex and his wife. If they are your children as well then you are an enabler; if they are their children then your ex should report the abuse to Child Aid in whatever State he lives in and take his wife to court. Men can be abused into submission and not just women are the victims of abuse, but, he needs to straighten up his spine and protect the children at least. If he does not report the incident to Child Aid then you are enabling this behavior put upon the children by not reporting it. Children have no control over such situations, but adults do! Your name will not be given out, but Child Aid will be discreet in finding out if the children really are being abused. You do not know for sure if your ex is making this up to gain your sympathy. It should be investigated and soon!
What to do if a woman hits you and you retaliate?
I've fought woman before who try to talk sh*t to me and put their hands on me or slap me and really they say man shouldn't hit a woman but I look at them like a man if they try to lay hands on me I believe everyone else should do the same forget what you hear.
If arguments get to the point where the police have to be called, it's not a healthy relationship.
You'll keep getting hit, and she'll keep going to jail.
The best thing for both of you is to separate.
How What if your ex husband abuser get remarried and look not abuser to new wife?
Give him time. He will.
Is massari going out with a girl?
Another rumor out of anger and anxiousness. If Massari has only one person he loves, and this person is all of his fans, they are like a crown in his head, without them he would have never became Massari and he would have never been able to show the true meanings of Real Love to the world.
How do you solve a problem when a man wants a women back and the woman doesnt want him?
is it the man or the woman who has the problem? if the other person doesn't want you, then you'd best move on. if not, then figure out (ask!) what the other person did not like about you, then decide if you are willing to address that issue or not.
Who is opposed to false reporting of spousal abuse?
- False reporting of spousal abuse is a crime because it taint's the character of the person being falsely accused. It is immoral, can cause damage in the accused person's life and the accused person should take legal action.
If someone hit me and i hit them back can i be in trouble?
It depends. If they hit you, and you hit them back, you could claim it was in "self defense", whether it was or not. It's generally better to avoid hitting them back and instead disable their arm in a lock or something.
On TV, it seems really funny. In real life, it is hurtful, annoying, and frustrating. It can be abusive if it is constant and there are insults added to the nagging.
'Nagging' is mainly about reminding people to do things that they ought to do. If it's agreed in your household that you mow then lawn and you haven't done so, and it needs doing, then your wife is perfectly entitled to remind you of your duties. (That said, there's no case for her being gratuitously offensive about it).
However, if your wife habitually goes out of her way to find fault with you, to put you down and bully you, then it's very bad.
