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Humor & Amusement

Laughter is good for your soul! In these busy times, it's hard to find time for pleasure, but there's always time for a joke or riddle, word plays, brain teaser, and other amusements that will make you laugh, and that's the purpose of this category. Join us for some good always-in-style laughter! This category covers all the questions that are here to make you laugh.

25,126 Questions
Humor & Amusement

There are 30 cows and 28 chickens. How many didnt?

There are 30 cows 20 ate chickens 28 is the answer 20 ate

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Humor & Amusement
Word Brain Teasers

Lovers love it friends need it a relationship starts with it and life ends with it - what is it?

The full riddle is: "Lovers love it, friends need it, a relationship starts with it, and life ends with it."

The answer is rendezvous.

Note to Supervisors: Merge all like questions asking the basic riddle. More than likely the user meant the basic riddle, despite the excess letter hints.

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Animated TV Series
Humor & Amusement
Shrek
The Smurfs

If you choke a Smurf what color does it turn?

Drop That Smurf!This question assumes that a smurf requires oxygen to survive, which is a valid assumption considering smurfs fear drowning as much as any normal air-breathing creature does. Furthermore, if smurfs require oxygen, then they must have some kind oxygen-transport molecule in their bloodstream. In vertebrates, this molecule is heme with an iron atom at its center and is what gives blood its red color. Since smurfs appear to be vertebrates, we can assume they also have heme in their blood. Now when a naked-skinned vertebrate is choked, namely humans, their faces turn red because surface capillaries in the skin dilate and blood rushes in. Assuming the same thing happens to smurfs, their faces would turn purple.
  • Believe it or not, this was answered on an episode of the Smurfs, in which one of them threatened to hold his breath until he turned red. But instead he turned a dark purple.
  • They are peaceful creatures, for one you should not choke them.
  • Choking smurfs is illegal.
  • Let's pretend that smurfs are little blue human beings. Human beings turn red at first when you choke them. Red+Blue = Purple.
  • I happen to know from experience, that if you choke a smurf (which you can do), they turn invisible. Its actually a very simple concept if you are intelligent enough to understand it, which, unfortunately, none of you are.
  • I once choked a smurf, but seeing as they don't have any lungs it didn't do anything.
  • I'm sure if you choke a Smurf they would turn white. It Chokes the blue right out of em.
  • Logically, I would say red, but I think it would be sweet if they turned green or orange or something really bright.
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Humor & Amusement

What are some bathroom items that begin with the letter A?

Here are some items found in a bathroom that begin with the letter A:

  • Ace bandage
  • Acetone
  • Acid
  • Acne cream
  • Acne medication
  • Adhesive pad
  • Advil
  • Aerosol hair spray
  • Aerosol spray
  • After shave
  • Aftershave
  • Aim toothpaste
  • Air conditioner
  • Air freshener
  • Air vents
  • Ajax cleanser
  • Alarm
  • Alcohol
  • Alcohol wipes
  • Aleve
  • Algae
  • Alka seltzer
  • All in one shampoo
  • Aloe
  • Aloe facial cream
  • Aloe Vera
  • Aloe Vera lotion
  • Anacin pain reliever
  • Anal thermometer
  • Andrew's liver salts
  • Andrex toilet paper.
  • Anti-biotic ointment
  • Antacids
  • Anti-aging cream
  • Anti-bacterial ointment
  • Anti-bacterial soap
  • Anti-biotic ointment
  • Anti-fungal ointment
  • Anti-perspirant
  • Anti-slip mat.
  • Antidepressants
  • Antiperspirant
  • Antiseptic (mouthwashes and first aid cream)
  • Anti-wrinkle cream
  • Apple scented body-wash
  • Applicators
  • Approved electrical appliance
  • Apricot cleansing grains (facial exfoliant)
  • Aquafresh toothpaste
  • Aqua net hair spray
  • Aquanet hair spray
  • Area rug
  • Arm and Hammer deodorant
  • Arm deodorant
  • Aromatherapy bath salts
  • Aromatic candles
  • Aromatic soap
  • Askew clothing
  • Aspirin
  • Automatic towel dispenser
  • Axe shower gel
  • The aerator in your faucet

Aftershave
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Music
Humor & Amusement

What marine animal can tune musical instruments?

Its a Tuna Fish
because 1 the word tuna is one letter from Tune get the joke?

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Humor & Amusement
Acronyms & Abbreviations
Roman Numerals

What does the letters d m c stand for?

Dozens of different things have the initials DMC.

They can be used for roman numerals: D=500, M=1000, and C=100.

DMC can mean Did mind coming, daily medical car, DeLorean Motor Company, Daimler Motor Company, Daelim Motor Company, Disaster Monitoring Constellation, among other things.

In case your asking in terms of Twenty century (ok Twenty first too) DMC is an eary rap phrase or hip hop, refers to Disc Master of Ceremony.

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Humor & Amusement

Meaning of itchy right hand or left hand?

this is based on a superstition this is answer is taken from another answer site The superstition is as follows: "If the palm of your right hand is itchy, then it fortells that money is coming to you, but don't scratch it as that stops the money from coming! If it's your left palm that is itchy, then scratch away, as that means that you'll soon be paying money."

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Humor & Amusement

Who goes there friend or foe?

Half and half!

it all depends on the situation. If it is to a party you will definitely want your friend to be there. if it is to a place that their can be harm, It is not recommended either go there.

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Humor & Amusement

Why are Humorists important to society?

Because if there wasn't any laughter in our world, it'd be so depressing people would just want to lay down and die! I'm a humorist myself

:D

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Cows and Cattle
Humor & Amusement

What do cows dream of?

Bulls with LARGE.....

Horns. (what did you think?)

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Humor & Amusement

What is broad humor?

Someone with broad humor laughs at anything and finds humor any where. Also, laughing at people is considered 'broad' humor, and some may refer to jokes about women (Broads) as broad humor.

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Humor & Amusement
Books and Literature

Where can you find Tickle stories?

You can find them at Barnes and Nobles.

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Humor & Amusement
Math and Arithmetic

The biggest number in the world?

Numbers are infinite, which means they have no end. For that reason, there is no biggest number.

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Humor & Amusement
Lucille Ball

Who is Cassandria Carlson?

Cassandria Arnaz Carlson is Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz' biological grand daughter. Her mother was Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz' daughter Madeline born 1947.

Cassandria Lucianna Arnaz, is now the V.P. of Marketing and New Media Specialist for SyndicatedNews.NET. She has three children and her name can be found in the listing of the members of that website under her own name.

Attorney Blaine T. Bettinger was the main speaker for Valentines Day 2013 on a SyndicatedNews.NET episode which explains the procedure Arnaz-Carlson used to certify her lineage. The show was a medical and legal panel discussion not open to the public.

Dr. Bettinger is both a lawyer and a doctor qualified to speak on the matter of DNA. Prior to joining Bond, Schoeneck & King law firm, Dr. Bettinger obtained his PhD in genetics and he is the author of The Genetic Genealogist.

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Humor & Amusement
Comics

Where can you find VGCats The Animated Series?

Here's a link to them on you tube.

http://www.youtube.com/user/Omahdon/videos

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Humor & Amusement

What are the answers to Can You Zooley?

The question sheet and answers to "Can you zooley"are here http://msbeaker.blogspot.com/2010/02/lateral-thinking-and-logic-puzzles.html
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Humor & Amusement
Jokes and Riddles

Why did the teacher wear sunglasses to school?

she had bright students

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Humor & Amusement
Definitions

What does dissolution mean?

The Latin root dis- means not. You should know what solution means :) So dissolution means the opposite of solution.

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Humor & Amusement

How do you change light bulb in globe?

Spin it on its axis

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Humor & Amusement

What is it called when you've heard this bull before?

I'm pretty sure the correct term is "deja vu", which is French for "I've heard this bull before". Or maybe it is "deja moo!" (That is word play on deja vu.)

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Pysanky Egg Art
Humor & Amusement

Instead of an egg name something you'd be surprised to find inside an eggshell?

A chick. I get this joke and it's pretty funny. You would be surprised to find a chick in an eggshell. For those who don't get it (chick as in a term for girls/women). For an example sentence, "Look at that chick walking."

It's "chick" when you are using the term for both a girl and a baby chicken. Anyway, it would be surprising to find anything inside of an egg that isn't a chick or a part of the egg's original contents.

However, it would be surprising if you found a chick of any sort, and in any condition, in an egg purchased from a supermarket.

Not necessarily humorous, however, spies were known to imbed secret messages inside an eggshell, without breaking the shell!

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Humor & Amusement
Definitions

What do you call a person who laughs at everything?

annoying

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Academic Writing
Drama and Acting
Humor & Amusement
Scattergories and Words Starting with Certain Letters

All the letters that start with A?

1 (its A)

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Chimpanzees
Humor & Amusement

What do vogue and aliens share in common?

Possible answers:

1. Your least favorite celebrity, or at least their looks.

2. They are mostly likely all warm-blooded.

3. Nobody fully understands celebrities nor space aliens.

4. Nearly everyone talks about them, but few have met them up close.

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Humor & Amusement
Scattergories and Words Starting with Certain Letters
Adjectives and Articles
Cartoons

What are some heroes that begin with the letter K?

Kyaatamoriku - He was a japanese samurai. Legends states that he and his small troop of 200 people fought 3000 enemies and were victorious in the battle.

Kelly from Kelly's Heroes.

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