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Jokes and Riddles
Tickle your brain! Laugh and have some fun! If you know a great, non-offensive joke or riddle, this is the place for it!
9,294 Questions
What is in front of a woman and is behind a cow?
The answer to this riddle is the letter W.
Woman begins with the letter W (at the front of the word) and cow ends with the letter W (at the back/end of the word).
What did the 800 pound. monster say to the 400 pound. monster?
I. W. (I double you.)
Thanks, you are really smart! I just did the math sheet and I could not figure out what I.W. stood for. I.w.U 400+400=800lb
What is a riddle which has a cup as the answer?
Sure thing, honey. Here's a riddle for you: "I can be cracked, made, told, and played. What am I?" The answer is a joke, sweetie. And what's the punchline? A cup! Now go on and impress your friends with that one.
Why did the ant wear a bathing suit in the kitchen?
so it could.... that's the first part but the rest you guys have to figuere out
Oh, dude, you want some papa jokes? Alright, here's one for you: Why did the dad joke go to therapy? Because it had too many puns and needed to vent! Like, seriously, my dad jokes are so bad they're good.
What is a riddle that the answer is a cafeteria?
Oh, dude, you're hitting me with a brain teaser, huh? Okay, here goes - what place offers food, has tables, and makes you wait in line like it's the DMV? That's right, a cafeteria! It's like a food court but with more mystery meat specials.
What is a Riddle to find a vending machine?
Oh, dude, a riddle for a vending machine? How about this: "I'm cold and full of snacks, push my buttons and I'll give you a snack attack. What am I?" It's like finding a hidden treasure, but instead of gold, you get a bag of chips. Good luck on your quest for vending machine goodness!
What happens when joggers get mad?
Well, sometimes when joggers get mad, it's because they might be feeling stressed or frustrated. It's important to remember that everyone has their own struggles and emotions. Taking a moment to breathe deeply and appreciate the beauty around you can help bring a sense of calm and understanding.
Why did the lion eat the tightrope walker?
Oh, dude, the lion ate the tightrope walker because he wanted a well-balanced meal! Like, who wouldn't want a little acrobatics with their dinner, am I right? Plus, it's not every day you get to see a lion showing off his fine dining skills.
What is the middle letter in the alphabet?
There are 26 letters, so there is no exact "halfway". M and N are 13th and 14th, splitting the halfway point.
Why is a mother kangaroo unhappy when it rains?
On these days the kids have to play inside!(her pocket)
With what name a maths teacher call a thief?
First, we need the entire riddle.
Four teachers were walking. One is an English teacher, one is a Hindi teacher, one is a Malayalam teacher, and one was a math teacher. They all suddenly saw a thief. The English teacher shouted "thief.. thief." The hindi teacher shouted "chor.. chor" (chor in hindi means 'thief'). The Malayalam teacher shouted "kalan.. kalan" (kallan in malayalam means 'thief'). What will the maths teacher say or shout?
The math teacher would call the thief 420 420.
This joke is significant in India due to their laws and pop culture.
420 is the slang name given to petty thieves, tricksters, or frauds in the Indian subcontinent. This comes from Section 420 of the Indian Penal Code, which deals with cheating related crimes. It is referenced in the title of the Bollywood movie "Shree 420."
A careless zookeeper named Blake fell into a tropical lake said a fat alligator a few moments later?
(i just did this worksheet for my cousin)
Why was the cat kicked out of school?
The cat was kicked out of school because it was caught "cat"-napping during class, had a "catty" attitude towards the teachers, and was constantly causing "cat"-astrophes in the hallways. It seems like this feline was more interested in causing chaos than learning anything useful.
What one word do hook jelly and bowl have in common?
Well, honey, the word they have in common is "fish." Hook is used for fishing, jelly can be made from fish, and a bowl is often used to hold fish. So, there you have it, all roads lead to fish in this fishy little word game.
The tree in question has a total of 12 branches, each branch containing 30 leaves. On each of these 30 leaves, there are 5 flowers. Therefore, the total number of flowers on this tree can be calculated by multiplying the number of branches by the number of leaves on each branch and then by the number of flowers on each leaf: 12 branches x 30 leaves x 5 flowers = 1,800 flowers on the tree.
What is a good what am i riddle for a bookshelf?
I hold things with spines but they are not alive, I'm in all the places that people take out the things I hold, my name starts with B, and so do the things I hold. What Am I?
What is the answer to the joke What perfumes aren't supposed to do?
Well, isn't that just a happy little joke! Perfumes aren't supposed to be nosy, they're meant to be subtle and inviting. Just like a gentle whisper of scent in the air, perfumes should enhance your natural beauty and not overwhelm those around you. Just remember, there are no mistakes in jokes, only happy accidents!
What kind of music do psychiatrists like?
Psychiatrists, like individuals in any profession, have diverse musical preferences that are not determined by their profession. However, some may appreciate music that is calming or reflective to help them relax or unwind after a long day of intense work. Others may enjoy a wide range of genres depending on their personal tastes and interests. Ultimately, the type of music a psychiatrist likes is unique to the individual and not necessarily related to their profession.
What happens when a frog double-parks on a lily pad?
The frog police come and compound his lily pad. He then has to go to the DLP (Department of Lily Pads) and get a renewal so he can get his lily pad back.
Here's one: It's kind of rude and racist, just so you know.
Three guys are sitting in a plane. One is American, one is French, and the other is Mexican.
The Mexican guy takes a taco a says,"We have too many of these in our country," and he tosses it out the window.
The French guy picks up a bottle of wine and says, "We have too many of these in our country," and he tosses it out the window.
The American guy picks up the Mexican guy and says, "We have too many of these in our country," and he tosses him out the window.
What did the ms snerd say when her son ate 17 chocoate- chips waffles with 2 pints of maple syrup?
Well, Ms. Snerd probably said, "Well, looks like someone's aiming for a sugar coma! Hope you enjoy the inevitable sugar rush and subsequent crash, kiddo. Maybe next time, stick to a more balanced breakfast... like a fruit salad or something."
