Breakups

You should grow up and learn to demand a higher standard of behavior from a relationship. I agree! Sometimes when we have feelings of love for another person, it can be almost impossible to believe that we will ever get over that person, especially when we are young. Thoughts of that person appear to refuse to go away no matter how the other person has treated us. I would like to share with you what I learned later in life and I hope it will help you. When younger, I always reasoned with my feelings, not my head. I had several times when I thought I would never get over a break-up with someone I loved, but I did. Now, here is what I learned in my 40's: Women think and act according to their hearts and feelings. Men, on the other hand, think and act according to reason and logic. I am not implying that men do not have feelings. They certainly do, but they do not generally make decisions based on feelings. It's a Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus type of thing and it might help you to read that book. Because women base their actions at times on feelings, especially when a relationship is involved, it makes them very vunerable and prone to make a lot of mistakes. In your situation, I know you are hurting and it will not do a thing for you to tell you that your hurt over this boy will eventually go away. It is just not that simple. You need something that will help you now. Let's try this: I want to say to think logically, but I honestly do not believe that will work. Let's try the cold, hard truth instead. You said yourself that the boy used you. That is the same as stating he never cared about you. And what did he use you for? If it was sex, the boy may simply have wanted that and nothing else. While sex usually makes a girl feel closer to a boy, it is certainly not always that way for the boy. If he did not use you for sex, then he used you for something else. It does not matter what he used you for. Using another person is using, period, and the only thing that happens to the used person is they get hurt. Don't make the mistake of thinking if he just will come back he will fall in love with you, or at least stay with you. While that could happen, it is not likely. What is highly likely to happen is that you will just get used and hurt again. You also said he lied to you. Even if you were to get this boy back, what makes you think he would not just come back to use you and lie to you? The most important question I believe you need to ask yourself is this: What about me causes me to want a boy back that used me and lied to me no matter how I feel about him? Answering that question can save you a world of hurt and mistakes in life. I know because I have been there. I lived my life from my early teenage years to about 10 years ago allowing myself to be hurt by relationships because I based my decisions on feelings and emotions instead of logic and sound judgement. I did this because I believed the love from another human being (a man) would make my life great. It doesn't work that way. You first have to respect and love yourself. Please, no matter how you feel about this boy and how much you are hurting, examine yourself and find out the reasons you would allow yourself to be used and lied to and still want this boy back. Your course in life could be greatly changed by doing this. I know my life would have been. I hope you will consider everything I've said. If you want to talk more, please notice that there is a Discusion tab beside the answer tag on the question page. You can post any questions or say more on the discussion. I hope all the best for you, but my greatest hope is that you will work through the hurt you are experiencing and not allow that boy to return to your life under any circumstances.

Hi..Im Neisha..This is how I see it..If you guys broke up, and the next week he is kissin all over some other female..he's probably doin it to make you jealous or something..but then again..if he lied about the other girl...then no you should not trust him because he cant tell you the truth about what he really did..DONT TRUST HIM!!! much love..and hope things work out... Neisha Boo

Not technically He just maybe comfortable with the person, and that is why he continues to use the nickname. But if the person feels that the other might still like them then they should simple just ask.

Only you can answer this however, I realize this must be upsetting but you have to ask yourself do you trust him to go out on his own knowing he may be drinking? I do have to say as well drinking/drunk is absolutely no excuse for cheating if you are in a committed relationship.

Unfortunately, sometimes its not always "just one time" it just happens to be the only time you know/found out about. If you do decide to forgive him don't let that be a license to walk all over you. If you do decide to part ways move forward with your head up and remember just because one person has done that don't let them wreck it for the possibilities in your future. Weigh your pros and cons and do what is best for you - Good Luck.

It sounds like he has some issues in his life he needs to work out, and thinks it would be better to deal with them without you.
If he loves you he'll come back when he is ready.

u cant make somebody luv u. just try to have sex with him. he mite luv u back for ur body.

In most countries you have rights on your partners money only if you are married or have signed some sort of legal bond

My girlfriend made up this term referring to a potential fight that was going to break out. "I think they were about to have a fist off"

If she loves him and he loves her back then there is no problem. Ask yourself: Are you jealous that she has a guy? Do you feel you don't get to spend as much time with her? If so the real question is how can YOU cope with your friend spending so much time with her boyfriend. Let them be, if they're happy then nothing is wrong. don't do anything.

Sure they can. But who would want THAT? There are plenty of people out there who can say they love you and not respect you. Real love and respect go hand in hand. If they really love you they will respect you. If they don't respect you - it's not love plain and simple.

Putain laid me laisser seul

Its best to communicate with them instead of waiting around for signs that may not come or be there. There is no room for games in relationships so if you want something you have to go try and get it.

I think he is trying to let you down very gently.

i feel your pain, trust me. but there's nothing you can do ):

Give yourself a kick in the butt and realize your ex is an all time super jerk! He's not had any sensitivity towards you, but now your girlfriend. By the way, girlfriends of yours shouldn't be dating your ex's so I would think she got what she deserved. It's time to move on hon. Be thankful you didn't get stuck with this twit. Look at it in a positive manner. You and your girlfriend start going out and having fun and now you are FREE to date anyone you like! Wooohooo! Freedom time! Have fun as life is just too short! Marcy

Talk to him nicely about it and if he don't leave you threaten him by pretending to get the cops involved or get a restraining order :)

what would it take to get back together with you wife? People have a real short patience level when planning a relationship. If you sit back and take a look at people who are in long relationships, it kinda fills you in....if you stick it out, you have each other for life, and it don't get better than that. Michael Sabedra in my first relationship going on 17yrs and it was not easy getting here but dam worth it!

don't tell him you love him just move on

what he is doing is trying to gain the upper hand in the relationship by showing you need him.

This is just am opinion, but I think you should take charge. I read that like 80% of guys want the girl to make the first move. Follow your heart if this doesn't help or work.

it sounds odd that he would break up with you because he didn't know what love feels like. but there are some sad people out there who really don't know how to love or don't know what love feels like, because they have never been loved.

he feel threat that she will tell something wrong about him. he feel bad when he sees his ex. he became shy and uncomfortable in front of his ex.

It is not clear if you broke up with your ex or if your ex broke up with you. Either way if you are now both broken up you need to accept this and stop texting. What you are doing is harassment.