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Breakups
It takes two to make it work, but only one to break it up. This is the place to ask questions about the pain, healing, and possible solutions to relationship break-ups.
8,665 Questions
Como esta tu trabajo in English?
The Spanish phrase Como esta tu trabajo means how is your work, in the English language. Spanish is spoken in almost all of Latin America.
QUESTION EXPLAINED: I started dating a guy around 4 months ago. We dated for around 3 when I started hanging out more with a guy friend of mine. I didn't tell him, because I knew he would be upset, but I didn't think there was anything to worry about. The guy ended up trying to kiss me and one thing lead to another and we broke up. We tried the friends with benefits thing but ended it when he thought I started acting too much like we were in a relationship. We were friends for a while, then started benefits again, and just recently I ended it telling him it was all or nothing. He is the best friend I have ever had, and does more "friend things" than anyone else I have ever known. I don't want to lose him as a friend, but I can't help finding myself still wanting to be with him. I know I made a mistake by not telling him who I was spending my time with an I feel horrible. I know that hurt him, but now I am hurting. After sex I ask him how he feels toward me and his reply is "A little more than a friend, but not like a girlfriend." I know the sex is wrong, but I am absolutely torn apart and I feel like Im leaving on this hope that maybe one day he will miss me. While I rarely see the guy that tried to kiss me anymore (I told my ex as soon as it happened), I still talk to him occassionally, almost as a source of comfort. I know that is wrong too. I want my comfort to be my ex. I miss him, and I'm so confused. What am I supposed to do?
You are seeing your ex today for the first time since you broke up what should you do?
Just be yourself. Smile when you see him, give him a quick hug if you want too. Nature will take it's course so don't push it and you just never know, you could get back together again. If this isn't the case then simply smile, say hello and ask how he's doing and move on. Act as if he's simply an aquaintance. Well, if its just a casual meeting to chat, then just chat about what has been going on in your life since the breakup and dont bring up your relationship with them or new ones, be vague about the new ones, if any. If its to rekindle, then you have to get all the reasons you broke up in the first place on the table, resolved and a plan for them not to happen again.
You write this person a letter, telling them your sorry and that you would like to talk to them about what was going on in your heart at the time, and what is going on in your heart now. You say you would like to talk, but in their time. You deliver it to their postbox and wait. Dont call, dont try see them. just wait. and see how they respond.
Hey I was like in the same place as you. If u still like/love the person and they don't want you and it hurts you to see that person and not be together then I suggest stop being friends for a little while until u get over it then can get back to being friends or whatever :)
- The problem is Facebook itself and as long as your ex is in control there is nothing much you can do about him deleting you from his Facebook. You can control yourself by doing yourself a favor and staying off Facebook. As far as the keys to your house get a locksmith up and get your locks changed. If you try to get the other keys back it will only bring on more anxiety and he could well have had other copies of the keys made. Locksmiths aren't that expensive.
What does it mean when you can't cry?
Not crying doesnt mean anything. Eveybody shows emotions diferently. Some people cry, some people yell, and some people want to cry but just can't.
Doesn't love suck! You just have to try to convince him that you do really love him and only want to be with him. maybe he will come around.
Why does your girlfriend freak out when your dancing with another girl?
short of a family member you should never dance with another girl and dont even ask why there is no real reason just don't do it and dont ask her why
What questions do you ask when you are broken up from someone?
- When a couple that were going together on a steady basis break up then the person that is being left behind because the other is breaking off the relationship has a right to know why. Sometimes the ex will explain themselves and other times they will continue to move forward and you will have to accept that. When young it is not uncommon for love to come and go, but, in the end you will find the true person you should have in your life.
You like this guy that thinks you hate him. so what should you do?
to be honest, i would try to get over him. there are plenty of guys out there and there is no reason to waste your time on someone who has no interest.
-twisdalegirk- I am going through the same thing, i think you should try to get over him but if you REALLY love him no matter what wait and pray just maybe he'll come around(: best wishes:)
The long love that in your thought doth harbor?
"The Long Love that in my Thought doth Harbour," is a poem written by Sir Thomas Wyatt. Wyatt was an English poet during the Renaissance.
What does it mean when your ex says 'I'm in ever-growing love for you'?
He means that either: 1. he wants to get back together 2. he wants to get in your pants.
What does it mean if your partner says 'It's not working'?
One thing it does show you is this person who said it to you has #1 limited speech, #2 is non-communicative (a fault) and #3 immature. It's a good thing you find out now than later. "It's not working" just means this person feels the relationship is not working out and they aren't happy. It probably isn't anything you did wrong at all, but being attracted to someone is all about chemistry. Some people can fall madly in love with a person, and a few months down the road fall out of love with them. These people are "in love with love" and know very little about what love really is. It's egotistical and their life and especially their feelings are all about themselves.
Consider yourself lucky, hold your head high, and say, "You know, something has been bothering me about our relationship and I wasn't quite sure what it was. Thanks for clearing it up." Keep walking, because there is someone special out there for you.
Good luckMarcy
AnswerThanks Marcy,I dated this girl for 5 months. It was a blind date. I thought that things were going wonderfully. She introduced me to her parents after a month of dating and said that they loved me. Went on holiday in July and she asked me questions about my past and ex etc. I asked her and she told me she has dated a few guys since her long term relationship. Her long term ex went and got married to someone else. I asked how did they split up and she said that they didn't really split up "confused" what does that mean? Her ex is married and lives in another country... I said are you over him and she said yes. She also said that she gives her boyfriends a six month trial period??? In mid July she said that she wanted a relationship not just based on sex. So I said I can respect that. We didn't sleep with each other for over a month and we just went out. Then at a family firend of her dad's wedding reception we stayed at a hotel room togather and got intimate and thought things were fine. A few days down the line before she was due to go on holiday with her parents I called her and she said this isn't working, that Iam not confident enough and too predictable. It was left at that when I called her in the evening and asked if we were going to meet up. She said yes and then said yeah this isn't working and I reacted and said you are right and that you are cut up over your ex and cannot have a meaningful relationship. So she said is that good bye and I said yes.. Confused. I called her after 1 month and she talked to me saying that what she said was constructive criticisum so that I should be better aware for my future relationships and said that I had relly hurt her and she cannot forgive me or can ever be friends.. I guess that's the end of it. But this has left me confused as I did say to her why she didn't tell me this earlier on as you know if you like someone or not in a couple of months of going out with them?
AnswerHi thereMy pleasure! I know you're hurting, but now that you have explained more, guess what ... it is she that has the problem and not you! She is the one that's immature, confused and selfish. She is playing one man against the other and here's something else ... she has zero confidence about herself because she could fight for her ex, not involved you without any respect for your feelings. I'm very proud of you for standing your ground and I hope I don't offend you by saying ... you're one great guy, there is nothing wrong with you and there is a special girl out there for you and she'll be lucky to go through life with someone like you.
Kick this girl to the curb and let her drift through life. The old saying, "the head of the snake always bites you in the butt" is going to be so true for her. She is playing with fire. The other guy is married, she is playing head games with you. Of course she has left you confused because she has managed to have you believe it's all your fault, when in reality it's hers!
I was married at 22 to a guy my family and friends didn't like and warned me about. Of course I thought I could change him, but deep down I knew I couldn't. He loved women and obviously I wasn't enough for him, so one day (just like you) I'd had enough and after being silly enough to marry him, I left. I was scared, heart-broken and felt guilty as if it were my fault. It took me six months after I started living on my own to realize it wasn't my fault at all and I had no control over his actions, but I sure had control over my own destiny. Thank God, I got out of that mess, because a year later I met my wonderful husband and we have been married for 33 years. If I hadn't gone through that heartache I wouldn't have gone down the path I did and met my husband. I know this will happen to you as well.
So proud of you and I really wish you the very best of luck finding that special girl soon. I know she's out there.
Stay strong & good luckMarcy
AnswerThank you again Marcy,I didn't think of it like what you have described her mentality as. That really she is the one with the issues and zero confidence and I now realise that she is playing head games and playing one man against the other. It's a shame that there are people like her out there. They should be banned from dating or maybe they should introduce a dating passport with history of past relationships on record so that it weeds out people like that.
The thing I could not understand is that her ex got married 3 years ago and lives in another country Kenya about 3000 miles away from the UK. But she still keeps in touch with him over the phone. She did tell me that he doesn't like her to go out with other men but he can't do much about it. So now I get it!!! she tries to make him Jealous by having relationships and hopes that one day he gets back with her... She is 31 years old and not a kid or anything special to look at.
You didn't offend me by saying I am a great guy. Thank you. But I kind of wonder if being a great guy is a liability in life as you then are an easy target for girls like her and it seems all the bastards always get what they want. But hey that's life..
You are so right. Kick her to the kerb and let her drift through life. Move on.
Thanks again for all your advice and you are a great source of help. Whish I knew about your website when I was dating her. I would have moved on much quicker : )
What does it mean if you keep seeing your ex boyfriend in your mind?
Maybe he's suppose to be there for a reason. Maybe your just suppose to talk him about something important, something that maybe was left unsaid?
The mind can be a tricky thing to understand.. But Love is most difficult.
Why is it taking so long for your girlfriend to warm up to you?
I'm sure you know some girls can be shy or unsure about a relationship and if you comfort her without freaking her out then she should probably warm up to you just fine. You may want to ask her about her morals and beliefs or find out about them. Depending on what warming up means to you she may just not be okay with it yet. She may have never been in a relationship before and is unsure of what to do. Again comfort her and above all do not rush her into anything she does not want to do. Just keep reminding her of why she went out with you in the first place (not verbally you idiot) and I am sure she will be more comfortable with you in no time.
If a person is 74 years old what year were they born in?
- In 2010 when a person is 74 years old they would have been born in 1936.
Why does your heart ache when you see your first love?
It does not, it's just a feeling that you get because you have deep feelings you get and since people say that your heart stops when you have love, well that isn't true. You would be dead if it was.
How do you know if your back is broke?
u wont move it and u cant breath good and when u try st reaching Ur neck it will hurt
What does it mean when there's a crash course in a relationship?
It means that somewhere in the relationship you will fall out and have arguments. It happens in every relationship, and it should.
take a deep breath bite your tounge and get on with your new life it happend to me 10 years ago and things couldent be better keep a good relationship with your ex and let her go find herself remember when she calls and starts nagging you can just hang up its like an off switch
