0
Breakups
It takes two to make it work, but only one to break it up. This is the place to ask questions about the pain, healing, and possible solutions to relationship break-ups.
8,665 Questions
What does it mean when a young man tells you you're not on his level?
He's either very arrogant and I think he is or he would have been diplomatic enough not to say such a thing to you, or your interests in life or maturity levels aren't the same. It's import as well no matter what age that you have a partner that can meet your intellectual needs.
Don't despair because this guy sounds like he's full of himself and he's a product of his own imagination. Tell him to take a hike! You will become wiser as you age and don't let anyone EVER put your down in this manner!
How do you tell your ex you don't want to see him anymore?
Step 0
Know what your priorities, most deeply held values, capabilities, resources, and time constraints are.
Step 1
Listen to your feelings after the request is given. If you don't feel enthusiasm then it's probably a sign that the activity doesn't fit in with your priorities in life or else that you are near the limits of your time and capacities.
Step 2
Tell the person firmly no, and internally commit within yourself to keep saying no. A confident, unwavering voice conveys to the person that you a committed to saying no, and that their efforts to persuade you will be unsuccessful. When people hear vague, wishy washy responses they often build up false hopes and are just the more disappointed when you say no.
There is one caveat to all this however - oftentimes further conversation reveals that you didn't understand their initial request and that you actually would like to do what they're asking you to do. Be careful though to separate "persuasion", which you should try to avoid, from "information gathering", which is good.
Step 3
Communicate, communicate, communicate. Just because you have already decided that you are going to say no that doesn't give you permission to be abrasive or confrontational. You need to sincerely communicate with the other person, and depending on your relationship with them, you need to disclose some of your reasons for saying no. If the relationship is superficial, such as with a salesman or a sales clerk, you really don't need to give any reasons at all, just a firm no repeated until they get the idea. However, if the relationship is important, such as with a sibling or your boss, you generally should give several reasons for your refusal, and try to make sure that they understand you even if they still don't like your refusal.
Here are several examples of reasons for saying no:
-I'm sorry, I can't help you with that right now. I simply have too much on my plate already.
-(To a close friend) Geez, it sounds like you really need some help. Let me see if I understand your situation. - restate their situation as you understand it -. Well, I can't do it today, but what about Saturday?
-(To a superior at work.) I would love to help with the project but I simply not qualified for it and here's how...
-(To a salesman) The product looks very useful, but I simply won't be buying today thank you.
Step 4
Learn how to be okay with not being "the nice guy/girl" or the "good son/daughter", etcetera. Learn how to mentally not accept people's attempts to guilt you into compliance with their request. Learn how to distinguish unhealthy guilt, coming from an impossible desire to please everyone all the time, and constructive guilt alerting you to true violations of your inner moral code.
This question does not need all these steps. If you are adecent person, with good basic values, just do what your heart tells you. You are not on this planet to fulfill anybody's expectations but your own. Don't allow youself to be begged, bullied , or guilted into doing anything you are not comfortabledoing .
Your partner is giving you a soft breakup---one in which he provides vague reasons why he is ending the relationship, so that both of you can ease out of it with the least amount of pain and fallout possible. Whatever his thoughts, he is doing the right thing, instead of stringing you along when he knows he no longer has the feelings for you he needs to be in a relationship with you.
Breakups may feel like they came out of nowhere, but that's generally not the case. Before a person ends a relationship, they have known for some time that their feelings for their partner were fading and they often attempt to hide that from their partner.
Don't be bitter towards your ex, but do the best thing for both of you by offering him a breakup and not keeping in contact at this time, so that you can have the time and space you need to get over this.
The first question is "How long have they been broken up?" When my boyfriend and I broke up, we still hung out with each other for a year. We are just getting to where we can talk to each other without letting each other know what are feelings are because we don't really have feelings for each other anymore. When people break up, they are always going to have some kind of relationship afterwards even if it is just being friends. You can't be one of those jealous people and go accusing him of what he is not doing unless you see or hear it for yourself. Believe me, I have been in this same situation just on the ex-girlfriend's end.
What is the best way to reunite with your ex-boyfriend?
don't bother........move on.........its going to be tough as hell.........but that's what uve got to do........
I agree move on it will be hard but if they want you back they will come to you trust me..if they don't then you know its not ment to be, But if you feel like you and ur ex are ment for each other then why not give it a one more try ...try and become friends with them don't mention the break up or realtionship don't push ur ex away pull him towards you...just try and become really good friends with them and show them that u have changed the ugly truth is that ur ex does not want to date the same person! that's why u broke up ..so hang out with him and show him that u have changed! this might make ur ex rethink things over!:)
Talk to him. Maybe you can work something out.
Why did he break up with me but will not let me go?
he broke up with you because he wants to be hard to get but he still really loves you talk to him see whats going on with him
maybe you did something he didnt like but apologize and ask for another chance. hey, you never know! he might just take you back! :)
Answer
He doesn't want to be the bad guy in the matter. He broke up with you, so you should act in that truth, as some would say. Change your habits--take different routes, do not spend time with the same crowd as he does. Move on. While the attention may be flattering, it is a matter of his control over you, which is not the best for you. Do not change yourself trying to do what you think he wants.
If it is actually YOUR home and not a home you bought together call the police, he's trespassing.
You'll have to ask him to leave, leave yourself or go to a lawyer and the lawyer can decide who gets the house.
You have him served Or-- you can go out of your way to make him WANT to leave. Bwahahahahaha!
It probably means he's too much of a loser to find or afford a place of his own. Kick him out and help him to grow up even more. At the very least, let him leach off of someone else.
Will you be physically safe? Maytbe you should consider changing the locks....
Has he said why he doesn't want to be with you anymore? It's a pity he didn't say anything before this..... you could have worked together on healing your relationship.
Is he sure he doesn't want to be with you (if he doesn't why is he still there?)....
If the property is jointly owned or if the couple reside in a community property state neither spouse can force the other to leave the residence, nor can either spouse impede the other's access and rights to the property.
If the issue is one of domestic violence, the authorities should be notified and the victimized spouse should apply for a restraining order in the court of jurisdiction.
Other than that, one of the parties will need to file for a dissolution of marriage and the property ownership issues will be determined by the laws of the state of residency.
Ask him why.
None of us want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with us. Find out what you need to do so that you don't lose out to abandonment of the house. If possible, move yourself out and move on without him. Caution--if he has health problems, this may be a symptom of depression and he was just saying it, without meaning. As the person above said, it looks like you need more information.
For Certain, You Better not Leave!
The most likely reason why your husband does not want to leave is that he is already considering a divorce and contemplates his rights to your "in common" property. If that is the case - and I can not be certain that it is - you should not leave under any circumstances. I know that there is a great temptation to get away from him and leave, but, most likely, that is exactly what he wants you to do.
Call a lawyer.
Should you break up with your boyfriend if he doesn't get you a Christmas present?
Unless your boyfriend is going through money troubles and you know, you should break up with him. That is, only if you feel like he didn't get you a present because he was too lazy or didn't know what to get you.
If you have the thoughts that your boyfriend doesn't care about you, then break up with him. Break his heart before he can do the same to you. He might not have gotten you a Christmas present because he didn't want to waste his money on somebody he doesn't want to be with anymore.. Think about it.
Hope this can help you think about what to do,
CeeCee Gold, PHD
- Your mother is well aware of what type of man she has married and it is up to her to try and resolve the problem. You and your brother should sit down with your mother when your step-dad is not there and tell her how you both feel. If things get really bad and your mother does nothing about abusive behavior by your step-dad then you can phone Child Aid and have them resolve the issue.
What to do when ex broke up with you and now saying he messed and that he still loves you?
he broke up with you for a reason, maybe it was for another female. if he loved you in the first place he wouldnt have broken up with you. theres plenty of good guys out there dont settle for someone who wouldnt settle for you
Do you believe in eternal love?
No, I do not. Women and men are not so inter-dependant upon each othe in this age of independance, and so they grow apart. Furthermore, no money no love.
Its already not fair or right for putting your wife in this position and your not doing her any favours staying with her at this point when your feelings, heart and head are with someone else. You inevitably have to do what you think is best but its also best to not lead your wife on anymore and do the decent thing and let her go.
What if a guy tells you he loves you but doesn't call or text for a day and still lives with his ex?
Answer If some guy tells you that he loves you but still lives with his ex, then the love for you can't be that great and maybe he's telling you this so he can get in your bed and between your legs. If he truly loved you he'd leave his ex. If I were you, I'd dump this liar and find a guy who isn't living with an ex and only wants you in his life. Good luck
Wife left you for another man for 2 years now she wants you back can you take her back?
You could take her back, if you feel fine with being her second choice. She's just using you as if you were a sucker. She left because she did not want you, she still does not want you. She just wants you to support her, until she finds a better man. Once she finds another man, she'll leave you again.
Why wont he look in your eyes when he says he loves you?
Oh, honey, it could be anything across the spectrum. He might not mean it, he might mean it too much. He might be shy. Men are not socialized for comfort with big emotions. I have experienced versions of what worries you with people I was quite sure did care about me, so I know it can happen. But your asking this tells me you are worried about more than just eye placement. If you tell me more, I will try and help you more. I have been where I think you are. Good luck.
What if the guy you like says sorry and you don't want to hear it?
let him know, nicely, that your still upset and that you know he is sorry but you still need time to get over it.
no!
How do you move on from a break up when you still love your boyfriend?
just try your best to move on and always trust in god. Pray to him and you will see how things will change
What is a broken hearted love?
a broken hearted love is where the male/female doesn't love the other and breaks up and breaks the other persons heart at the same time and doesn't give a damm about how, where or when they break up 'cause the don't care at all.
How do you stop liking someone that is using you?
Its hard to stop loving or liking someone that is using you because love is a very confusing thing. However you have to realise breaking it off with this person is the best thing for you
well we have been fighting for awhile but we always work it out but i got jealous of some girl at his work.then one night right before he left he hugged me and said i will love you no matter what.but i havent talked to him since then and wont answer my texts or calls anymore but when we did answer them all he wont say was "i just cant anymore"and"you'll find someone better" he thinks this just because i never had another boyfriends but that was my choice i didnt want any others.he said that if i dated someone else then i would really know if he was the one and he said he would date someone too but i can't because i feel like its cheating.well all i want to know is how to get him back?to let him know im better?not as jealous?and that he really is the best?(but he won't answer my calls or texts)
How can you stop missing your abusive ex?
It is normal to miss someone with whom you shared your life. Try to remember the abuse episodes. It helps to counter the nostalgia.
Think of when they hit you.
It is possible that you are not "missing" the abusive/narcissistic ex, but rather you are grieving that the euphoric beginning period of the relationship will be gone forever. Narcissists and other abusers are famous for creating these "moments" in time; After all, it's a part of pretty much all personality disorders where abuse is involved to "split" the partners onto the "good" side; When the abuser's partner can no longer meet the abuser's needs, the unsuspecting victim is battered with emotional and physical violence unlike anything ever imagined;
For some victims of abusers, this might be the first (or only) time that (s)he appeared to be adored by another person. Only after a lot of self-analysis and inner-revelations does the abandoned ex realize that it was all just a mirage. And that is exactly how can you stop missing your abusive ex; look to yourself on how and why you got into the relationship to begin with.
Causal connectives are used when one simple sentence is dependent on the other. For example, I put up my umbrella because it was raining."
You can't use a connective like "and" or "so" here, because the first simple sentence "I put up my umbrella" is dependent on the second simple sentence "it was raining".
