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Breakups
It takes two to make it work, but only one to break it up. This is the place to ask questions about the pain, healing, and possible solutions to relationship break-ups.
8,665 Questions
What is the difference between Cant and Not Ready for a serious relationship?
There is no great difference but if someone is using this in anyway they are definitely not ready for any type of committed or serious relationship.
What does a man means when he tells a woman she is his problem?
Who knows!
He's not facing up to the fact that any problem he has is "his" problem, and solving it depends on him.
We cannot change other people - we can only change how we relate to them, how we respond to them, and how we behave around them.
The importance of feeling loved and wanted?
It is very importnat for a girl and boy to feel loved, even when they are in their teens. If they don't feel loved then they try to fill that void by either alchol, drugs, sex, popularity, or abusing people. Many parents think that they should let their child do what ever, but the truth is is that they will always need their parent's love - both father and mother.
Can your ex who says he still loves you but makes no effeort to be with you really still love you?
Yes. The question is why would it matter? Are you self sacrificing enough to give into this constantly without him giving anything. He can love you without giving you anything in return for your love. It is a personality thing breed from either a self esteem issue, domination issue, or just immaturity possibly.
What if my ex-husband says he loves me and wants me back but doesn't show it?
It means that he's not honest. Don't worst your time. He's an ex for a reason now so move on girl.
He is not emotionally available anymore?
- When someone tells another person they are not emotionally available to them any longer it means that person is drained mentally by the others emotions and they are tired with the relationship.
I am suffering from major depression and loneliness can anyone please help me?
you should surround yourself around your friends and family and have fun. if your really down about this you should try therapy. and go with friends or family so you wont feel alone and uncomftable. they could really help you through this and you shouldn't do this alone.
hope you feel better! :)
Since months have passed since you and your ex have broken up, it is natural to still have feelings for her when you saw her.
Well, to be honest, you should know that wasn't the smartest. I think the best thing to do would be to find out who you're true feelings are for. If they are for the guy you made out with, tell him and ask him if he feels the same way. If they are for your boyfriend, tell him that you made out with another guy. Hopefully, he will accept your apology and you will know what you did was wrong. Also, never hold in your secret. It will only make things worse in the end.
ANSWER:
If you think you can stop this relationship you must do it now, or else the people who do not know what's going on might get hurt. Just imagine the consequences that will happen if the two of you don't stop. Think about it before things goes bad...
How do you know if your relationship is ending?
first of all dont have sex! its really important just see if he will kiss you. if he starts toward a break up not only did you chose the wrong guy but you say its over first that way you arent hurt he is. we are girls! we are indapendant!
I'm sure this situation happens more often than you may think. Try talking to them and be honest with your feelings and let them know what you would like.
I am in love with someone who does not meet my needs what do I do?
You have to rethink your position and do what is in your best interest and best for you. A relationship is give and take not a one way street and you deserve to have what you give.
A betterment is an improvement to oneself, or a legal term for an improvement to a property which adds to its value.
I think yes because I think you can still talk some things out in your relationship and talk about the things that you don't understand with each other!
No, it cannot. It is simply a gentle cop out of a relationship.
Life and love are not TV shows or Movies. They're real. It's either there is love between the two people, or not. However, there are different types of love. Yet, in this case, romantic love can't take a break. You can't really "Pause" romantic feelings for someone. It just doesn't ever happen.
True love doesn't need or want breaks. However, sometimes, it happens, I guess. I think when you find true love, you shouldn't do anything to bring harm. When you find true love, you don't want anyone else at all. Be happy, be thankful, and no breaks needed.
No, true love doesn't require any breaks. Anyone who says "I'm taking a break from this relationship" is actually saying "I'm very kindly breaking up with you, and I don't want you to be hurt", so beware of any faulty breakup reasons that person will have. It may be something like "My cat/dog died", or "Because I got fired from my job". Any reason that doesn't involve you should not be accepted as genuine breakup justification.
The only thing I can think of and im ONLY SAYING THIS BECAUSE IVE DONE IT IS he or she is calling you because there not sure if they want to be broken up they think they still want you back the person probably doesnt know what she wants she probably still has feelings for you but not sure if the fame will spark again liek it used to I've done this before, it's because this person really likes you but doesnt know if they are ready for a relationship. They are simply confused and and cant make up their mind about what they want. But its obvious this person really likes you.. she doesn't want to go out with you because of something about you that she doesn't like or that makes her look bad, or something going on with her at home or she just doesn't want to go out with you. She keeps calling you because she still likes you and likes to talk to you, as friends or something,or just needs advice or comfort from your voice or just to know that you're not angry with her even though she broke up with you. She hates thinking that you don't like her anymore when she still likes you, even though she doesn't show it.
Is it possible for your ex-Narcissist to change and come back to you as a normal person?
[edit added] Whilst the answers below are very negative here is some slightly positive news. Yes it is possible to cure however its not an easy method per say. It takes time to re-program behaviour and abstain from certain practices and will depend on the extent of the personality disorder. It is rare and difficult to even begin healing but it does happen. The first step is to accept critisism and that they are flawed following that it takes time to seek help and make changes. Outside of this seek help from an approved source of information I would recommend a very helpful British charity called SANE please Google for the website. They will be able to help you further and if you are outside of the UK simply send them an email. Please remember this is something that is only begining to be treated and treatments are still very new, as we discover more about personality disorders hope increases. Further to this keep in mind that although your former partner may change to rebuild a relationship should only be done with the assistance of their councillor or psyciatrist. The biggest problem could be a possible regression it can be easy to loose their perspective. Should you end up together take an active involvement in their treatment they need to realise that its perfectly fine to not be perfect.
Take your advice on this from approved sources whilst the majority of narcissists haven't yet reached the toxic stages yet the majority of mateiral on the web comes from those with partners who have. It leaves a deceptive picture. Its for that reason that university's will never accept Google as a source of credible information. Turn to accredited sources such as mental health charities for accurate information.
No. Narcissist are egotistical, often highly intelligent but haven't learned to put that intelligence to good use and use it to hurt others. They feel superior to their peers and that just doesn't include their mate, but family, friends and coworkers. They honestly believe they are always right and everyone else is wrong. They are perfectionists to the utmost degree although possibly not a true perfectionist in the eyes of a normal person. They play games with not only their victim but others and find most other people intolerable as far as being on the same level of intellect as the narcissist thinks he is and thus, the narcissist is really very lonely. The old saying, "It's lonely at the top" is very true when it comes to the narcissist. It goes on and on and the whole thing is about "chess playing" and being "one up." Eventually, the narcissist will burn all bridges and at sometime in their lives will have ruined all relationships and their mind-games will have affected their own personality to the point where they will never know what a true and loving relationship feels like.
AnswerIt was vital for me to understand this before I left my N. I researched the possibility and met with two PhD's in Psychology - one of whom knew the N. Both said it is nearly impossible for them to change, due to the very nature of the problem - a lack of insight, or possibly a refusal to gain insight. Either way, there is an extremely low likelihood of change occurring. It is tantamount to brain damage. I was desperate to find someone, anyone... who would tell me there was hope. I could not find 'one' person. It was very discouraging and painful to accept. Yet at the same time, it was the truth that would eventually set me free. I believe we will all know someday of the eventual end of the N's we knew. Somehow, our lives will direct us to these answers either by direct knowledge (learning about their lives over time) or by our own spiritual discernment. Experiencing a more normal relationship with someone also illuminates just how sick an N is, and thus how unbelievably difficult it is for them to get well. Take care, Always Learning AnswerIt breaks my heart to read this as I too looked in vain for some hope that my N would/could change. I spent a lot of time researching this. It does help to know I did what I could. I loved this man. He is not capable of loving back. I can let go now that I have accepted this. Had I not learned about narcissism, I might have had painful doubts.Now I am free. AnswerIf the narcissist has had intense therapy and counseling there could be an improvement but come back as a normal person, not likely. Narcissist like so many other personality disorders are rarely cured because they are imprinted in there being. The question should be, do you want to devote any more of your time and life to a person that may or may not change. Dont you deserve better. You may be able to have a friendship with this person but not a relationship.What are the 20 hardest questions in the world?
There are many hard questions in the world all you need is to look around you to find them
How long to wait before contacting your ex?
If you have remained on good terms with your ex you are free to contact this person any time you like, and if you are on bad terms you would be advised not to contact this person unless you have a very pressing reason to do so.
Happened to me once... was old and worn, is a very natural thing, just doesn't happen to everyone, so not many folks realize it.
Belts are soft and pliable. after a while they just wear out.
What do you do if you want to be back with your ex and he is hesitant about it?
Love yourself first that is key... Put yourself before him ~ life is too short to waste your Precious time Get smart and Move on ...PEACE
It means they are using you for some reason which may not b so clear to you right now. it could b for security, convenience, finances your good looks something. but don't worry about it take a look at yourself and access the situation and try and cut loose. it is extremely hard and may even appear impossible and chances r it is impossible, but you must atleast try. All the best
Thanks, that's what I was affraid of. We talk about future, kids, home, trips and yet we've barely had sex once on my birthday, but she has always turned her head occasionally to kissing, never says anything sweet either verbally, text or email.She lives 2 hours away and I always make the effort to go see her every weekend, she isn't seeing someone else, she knows I'm in love with her, but treats me like nothing more than a good friend. We sleep in the same bed, but never any sex...i ask point blank to just say iso if she doesn't want me, ask her if she loves me and she says yes but I don't think she does/ her mom says she's a good and true person, but I suspect her mother doesn't really know her as well as she thinks.
Should i dump her, as hard as that would be to do? i cant seem to get her to talk to me about it, always changes the subject, she's good at that
That depends on YOUR personality and whether you can ever trust her again. Marriage is based on trust. If she did this to you once will you ever be able to trust that she won't do it again? She used her affairs as a way to punish you and made certain that you found out so that you would be hurt. It's an attempt to control you and change you into someone else. It's a blatant attempt at manipulation and if you DO decide to stay with her you both need to go in for some serious marriage counselling; her for her inability to be faithful and her attempts to manipulate and you for putting up with it and yes, for being a workaholic. BTW, our work is supposed to be what we do to pay for the lifestyle that we enjoy. On the one hand, it is not acceptable to love your work more than your family. On the other hand, your wife should not turn to other men. You two have some serious problems and I doubt that most relationships would ever be able to recover from them. I sincerely hope there are no children involved in this trainwreck.
Why would your ex be upset when they find out you are dating someone new?
They would be up set because they are still in love with you, or jealous because they can't have you!
- Breaking up with someone you love is a great loss and trauma if you weren't expecting it. Every human dreams every half hour, but one remembers a fraction of the dreams or nightmares within second of waking up. Without dreaming every half hour a person would go stark raving mad as it's the brains way of slowing down and also slowing the heart rate and other organs down in the body. What may seem like a long dream in reality is no more than seconds to a minute or two. Your dream is just a dream and this is strictly my opinion, but you could have been worried your boyfriend was cheating on you with one of your friends, thus, your friends killing themselves off from either guilt or fear of you find them out. The friend that was the baby could have been innocent from any wrong-doing on trying to date your boyfriend. Dreams for most humans are just that and an individual can pick up strands of a conversations they had with someone; a movie; TV, etc., and it gets mixed up in your dreams. Don't worry about it as it's your minds way of coping with the breakup.
