Cheating

I am really sorry to tell you this, but your husband is a jerk! He has cost you 9 years of your life. However, there had to be some signs there and either you were too busy raising children or working yourself to see those signs. This so-called excuse for a man is like most cheaters .... lacks self confidence, needs to be stroked constantly and told what a man he is, and hasn't had the guts to tell you he is unhappy in your marriage and lowered himself to cheating. When people are unhappy in a relationship this is what they should do: Remember the promises to each other and vows you took at your wedding. One or both of you should have admitted to each other there was a problem in your marriage and you both could have tried Marriage Counseling. Sometimes a temporary separation from each other for several months is all it takes to realize how much you love each other. If one or both mates aren't trying it's time to get a separation and start divorce proceedings. THERE IS NO EXCUSE FOR CHEATING! Your husband would have continued on with this affair if you hadn't caught him with his pants down (a pun intended!) Some men go through what was once called "Midlife Crisis" but, in reality, and a proven fact by doctors it's plain old Male Menopause! Oh yes, it's just not women that go through this. Although males don't go through such a dramatic change their brains can turn to mush and they can get plain silly. Some men just get moody, quiet, lethargic, perhaps depressed, while other men need to regain their youth and will often find young women to fulfill this need. Sounds like you've got the latter. You husband has broken the big one "Trust" and I never believe that once a person cheats they can ever be trusted again. Even if you do stay together there will always be that doubt in the back of your mind. The fact that you caught your husband and he didn't admit to it (first time affairs could be forgiven and hurt feelings healed in time) is a sure sign he'll either continue on with this affair or just have another one. I know it's tough, but kick this guy out! Get angry and grow strong and NEVER let any man hold you down. You've got a lot of energy in you hon, so start working on your strength and don't look at what has happened as a weakness. He simply doesn't deserve you! Good luck Marcy how sad for so long and how convenient for your husband pack his clothes and drop the load at the other woman place.

You just can't show her that she can trust you again. If you told her some things you need to follow it up with your action. It will take a while before someone can be trusted, especially if you hurt her or vice versa. Never hide things to her, always tell her everything so that way she will know that you can be trusted again. Trust is very hard to give after it was taken away. Just do everything that you think can help her.

Nothing, but time.

Time brings forgiveness, love and mostly regain trust.

It is very obvious. He wishes to get physical with her again. Dream is referring to a hint here.

all you have to do is run when your done

Or, Establish weather you prefer the man you have spent a day & night with or your current boyfriend? Tell your boyfriend anything that happened, maybe how you feel. Well that's what i would do, no point in being in a relationship with the wrong person :)

if you know for sure he has cheated on you than you talk to him. if he dosent care then i'd say hes not a good man and you might could find someone better.

The way that a wife could cope with it is 1.talking to the husband 2.calling someone in front of your husband sweetie 3.talk to a therapist 4.find out who he called sweetie and we he called her sweetie. and 5.beat the crap out of him with a golf club or any blunt object.

There are plenty of business that will attempt to get a little extra income by reminding businessmen of 'Admin' week, but who is there to remind him of wife's birthday, anniversary or kids birthdays? Maybe the thing to do would be to try to spice up the marriage. Make him a little more interested in YOU. Don't get upset if he doesn't respond at first. Many men get real focused on their business and it doesn't necessarily mean anything bad about the marriage. Remember that there was something special there when you first met and started dating. Try to recapture THAT. Yea, it sounds all very one-sided, but sometimes you have to fight for what you want.

The best thing for you to do is move forward and keep your distance from her and her new boyfriend. She doesn't want to be with you as she has moved on but enjoys being the object of your affection. It is best to move forward and allow yourself time to get over this - it will get better.

Stephanie Heavey

It could also be ART... Art is a jealous mistress!

Sure you can. How about a personal example. I'm an older man married to a woman 20 years my junior (no, it didn't result from some mid-life crisis and there was no other wife to leave behind) and she loathes exercise. I was raised by women and, therefore, feel quite comfortable in the company of women. It's a quality of conversation thing and you can talk about a lot more things at depth with a woman including feelings that is untouchable with men friends. I love to walk and am doing so as part of my plan to drop a few pounds. I'm doing this alone, and would like to have a woman with whom to walk--just walk. Okay, maybe an infrequent Starbucks after; just not intimacy and sex. You need to judge the, 'safe,' issue based on whether you have feelings, even minor tingles, toward the man or him toward. Yes, you can both ignore these feelings and persuade yourselves that you can keep it to friendship; you just won't likely be able to do it. So, the answer is contained inside why you're considering it. Oh, and if you decide against this, you can always join me for a walk :-)

Why didn't you stop the affair in the first place, before things get very serious. This is your biggest mistakes that will hunt you. If I were you, before your mistress start talking, I will tell the truth to your wife. Now that the consequences is finally hit you, you will end up with nothing because you can't keep your zipper close, ( no fun intended. You really thought that having an affair will give you pleasure?, I guess it did but at the same time you will destroy a lot of lives.

To be frank it is not safe to hire anyone online because you can never tell if they are trustworthy or not, the bulk goes to whether they have been tested and confirmed to be safe. I have been at this junction before of if it is safe to hire a hacker on Quora, I feel quite sad to tell you that a ran into a few fake hackers myself, I never thought I'd be a victim but I was. By the time a friend of mine introduced me to a real hacker, I already gave up on trusting a hacker anyway. But my friend convinced me that trust is the soul of any transaction or business deal, we need to trust people in other to satisfy our needs, it's what business on and off the internet is based on. After I understood what my friend meant, I followed his recommendation and hired the hacker he introduced to me, fortunately for me, I wasn't disappointed at all. The hacker turned out to be a real professional who is very efficient and trustworthy. Although she took a bit longer than she promised, in the end, she showed immense resilience and got the job done. That is why I answered this question to confirm that there are real hackers who are safe to hire, they are rare but they exist. I'm not really into sharing emails on quora but it will be unfair if I can't provide this remarkable hacker's contact… so if you discreetly need the service of a legit hacker then you should be talking to ( Kathrynsturm0617 AT GMail DOT com )she is an Angel and a life saver. Meet her for any hack related issue. Thank me later.

No it is not. However, it depends on the reason for asking her for her phone number. It could be completely innocent. I have had many phone numbers of women throughout the length of my marriage, however, it was almost always business related. There were also times when they were not, but had to do with other issues unrelated to a personal relationship. I would not assume the worst, but I would not be blind either. Marriage is based on trust. If you do not have that, you have nothing. Do you trust him?

You can't unless you know your husbands passwords on Facebook. And if you do you can check all the friends and who he talk to... Good luck...

Password

password

Yes.

The number of women he has been with is debatable. Some gossip sites are saying he is linked to 14 women, most of which have text messages, voicemails or photos to prove it.

On December 11, 2009 he posted a statement on his website admitting to his infidelity and taking an indefinite break from golf.

See related links for the statement.

Hi there. Yes I think this is possible in close relationships. However in some relationships this may cause tension and put a strain of the marriage. I have spoken to a few people who have been married for quite a long time, and due to health problems or sleep pattern disturbances one partner decides to sleep in a separate room. They too worry that this can affect their marriage and relationship but after talking through their fears with their partner everything is fine and their marriage is still rock solid. Some men aren't very affectionate or find it hard to show their feelings. I would try not to worry but definitely sit down and have a long talk with your husband about how your feeling and his less affectionate nature.

== == From personal experiance, as a male who has slept in a separate bed (actually, normally the sofa) from his partner:

Snoring, and very noisy breathing.

My partner sounded like a garden Vacuum cleaner (leaf blower) when asleep, at her quietest, and quite frankly I could not get a proper nights sleep.

I would always start off in the same bed, but, should the windows start to rattle, would withdraw. It would be fair that she get evicted, as it was her that was making the noise, but being a "nice guy" I left her the comfort of the bed, and sought peace & quiet elsewhere.

Or perhaps you are a "jerker". My current partner goes through a phase, about 20 mins after she falls asleep, lasting about 1 hour, when she is like a Mexican jumping bean. It's hard to fall asleep lying next to someone making random sudden movements.

Of course, it's equally possible that he has a problem that he does not wish to subject you to, and is sleeping elsewhere so as not to disturb you, but is too embarrassed to admit to.

I also suggest you ask him why, as he may care too much for you to complain about the fact that you are a "bit loud", or be embarrassed about the fact that he suffers from wind of monumental proportions while sleeping.

As a more general reply, Yes, I think it's possible to do it, and still love you.

Probably not the same mistress that he commited adultery with.

• Breaking the bond of trust is difficult to earn back. If he has not taken you back by now it is possible he may never take you back because you broke that bond of trust and hurt him deeply. Only time will tell. If you really had loved him you wouldn't find a need for cheating in the first place.

We do not know what "these lines" might be, and we also do not know what book these exercises are given.

Google online for Michelle Weiner Davis's divorce busting 180 degree list--it's a list of how to handle the time when you are thinking of separation or dealing with a partner's affair. He's sneaking behind your back to communicate with this coworker innapropriately: texts, flirting, hugs. While people in healthy relationships may have opposite sex friends, they don't keep their communications with that friend secret from their spouse; they don't sneak to contact the person. Your husband and this woman are having an emotional affair, possibly a physical one as well. The initial response is often to violently confront the cheater, to rush to divorce or somehow 'fix' the marriage. All are knee jerk reactions: what you need to do is decide what you want to do. Take a few days and decide what you're going to do with the information before divulging it. For example, if you choose to divorce your spouse, you want to look into divorce procedures in your local area BEFORE confronting. The evidence gathered might be inadaquate for filing on grounds, so do more snooping for evidence. Physical safety should be taken into consideration as well. Is your spouse violent? If so, you'll want to make certain that you've taken steps to protect yourself and your family. Gather and get your finances in order. Be prepared when you confront your spouse; let him be the one taken off guard for a change. If your spouse catches on that you are checking up on his activities, he and this coworker will take the affair underground and make it that much harder for you to get physical evidence. So act as natural as possible. A cheater will not end the affair if he doesn't have to face any consequences. Lay the evidence you have down and give your husband an ultimatum--he either ends the affair or you end the marriage. Either he ends the affair immediately (with a phone message that you monitor), ends all contact with this woman (even if it means transferring or finding a new job), allows you access to his texts/phone calls, and goes to marital counseling with you OR he moves out of the marital residence and you expose the affair to his and her supervisors and her spouse and file for divorce immediately. One or the other. If you let him decide his options, he still has control in the situation, so that is why I am suggesting YOU take control and TELL him what his choices are. If he chooses the affair, start divorce proceedings. Doing that may even scare him enough to realize he is going to be making a huge mistake. Don't confront the other woman; you will find no benefit in talking to someone who is invested in ruining your marriage. She possibly will lie to you to save your husband's skin. Don't be gaslighted; don't believe they are only 'friends'---your spouse will be terrified of consequences and out to save his own skin, and will lie about the affair as much as possible to avoid further fallout. He may also be angry, pretend to be hurt or even accuse you--of cheating, insecurity or even jealousy. Don't buy his act. The first truth about the affair is only the partial truth, it will take time and further investigation to find out how far this affair went. Then back off emotionally--act as disconnected from the drama as possible, get enough sleep, take care of your health. Don't harass your husband and don't support him either. He either steps up to the plate and goes to counseling or you really move on for your own good. If he refuses to find a new job or end contact with this woman, you should file for divorce and move on for your own health. There's no easy fix here: your spouse has to prove to you his willingness to end this affair and focus on his marriage; if he's unwilling, the marriage is effectively over. By choosing to cheat, he chose to deal with any consequences that could result from it, whether he likes it or not. So let him deal.

First, it would be difficult to know for certain that the hair was from another woman. Second, even if it was from another woman, people get others' hair on their clothing all the time just coming into contact with them. It sounds like there is a concern that your partner is cheating, though, since this was posted in the "Cheating" area and the implication is that this hair you found is from a woman he is cheating on you with. This raises concerns about the relationship regardless if he is cheating or not--because you are concerned this might be a possibility. It would be best to talk with him about these concerns and see how he reacts; don't just assume that he is cheating because of the hair, though, and don't confront him with accusations, because both of these will end up making him defensive and will further break down communication. Hope this helps! Dr. B.